I really need to stop wanting to be with people who are NOWHERE near me. Sometimes I tell myself this is all a bad idea. But my biggest regret is that I keep myself from throwing it all away for awhile to do something that makes me happy. This time I'm not holding back. I'm a big kid now, and if I plan things right I can take some risks. I remember an anime comic that someone once showed me online called "Ride" by a Bay Area Artist who went by the name John Locke. Whether or not this was his birth name or an assumed name (like the philosopher?), I don't know. I can't find it anywhere and I wish I'd saved it. There was a panel toward the end where the man decides to make his big move and written across the top of the image were the words: "All or nothing, this is love".

This is love, not for a person.. for a moment, an opportunity, a chance, life. Everyone is dying, maybe it's time to live.